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That’s why you always have to watch both his actions his words and pace yourself before you jump in too deep with a new guy.

(Note: Of course, you may write on your profile something like, “I’m looking for a great guy who cares about family, closeness, etc.

You send a text when you don’t want to talk to someone, but you want to let them know you’re thinking of them.

And what can be more flattering than conveying, electronically, the idea that you DON’T want to talk to the woman you’re courting?

Sure, there may be a few “player types” who are scared off by such a line, but there are also a fair amount of guys who are just as spurred on by such a challenge (or who at least ignore it entirely). ” isn’t some kind of lethal kryptonite that destroys every man who just wants a hookup.

The only REAL effective filter is judging guys based on their actions and looking for little signs in actual conversation.

So maybe the next time he texts, let him know that you turn off your cellphone at work, and he can best reach you on your regular phone.

Or maybe you tell him in a flirty way that the way to your heart is through your voice – and that, if he’s lucky, he might be able to catch you on your cell at before you go out tonight.

But you can refuse to play his game and still make him feel attractive, which will keep him chasing you through whatever medium you choose. Now now, don’t hate on men – I’m a single guy who is dating, and women I meet text me all the time. It drove me crazy for some of the reasons you talked about – a 5 minute phone call is so much nicer, more respectful, more intimate. It’s how Gen-Y communicates (I’m older than Gen-Y.) I finally decided to stop resisting it, and it doesn’t bother me anymore.

Please accept this weak form of communication and allow me to keep on sleeping with you.” And as long as you let them do it, they will continue to do it.

Because texting is only enabled by the person who writes back to the text. You’re letting him know that it’s a poor way to reach you.

Understand this about men: they will usually do the least that they can to maintain their relationship. But here’s the real problem: there are women everywhere who are complete suckers for this crap.

So if he can text you at 11pm on Friday night after a week of silence and charm you with something like: “UR 2 hott! Maybe it’s a low self esteem thing, but as long as some desperate girl lets him get away with it, he’ll always have a low-maintenance sexual outlet.

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but at least in this case you’re writing it as a positive rather than the negative “No hookups!

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